Hibernating
Cycles... I fall for it every time. That creeping panic that this winter might just have been the one to have finally killed that plant I have my eye on. Checking each morning if any green is peeking through the soil, or if a new leaf has appeared on that bare branch. And each day that I don't find anything, the tension builds. Well, this has been a particularly hard winter. Sleepless nights with a new baby, the emotional roller coaster of an adjusting four year old brother, and now the terror of losing my ability to walk. First I was afraid of not being able to go for a much needed run, to drive myself to work, to care for my children. Then I found, it was also about not being able to get in the shower alone, to get my boot on and my crutches accommodated quick enough to make it to the potty in time, or just the simple act of carrying a cup of coffee to the couch to sit calmly and listen to KUT in the morning. It became the torture of listening to my baby cry and not being ...